Characters
Jerrold
Abbington - a former Congressman
from California who had run unsuccessfully for the U. S. Senate
before leaving his wife and three kids and coming out of the closet
as gay.
Tricia
Abbington – the former wife of
Jerrold Abbington; An author of some note burning with the desire to
run for President.
Yang
di-Pertuan Agong – the monarch.
King of Malaysia
Don Allen
- a congressman from Texas who had been the Libertarian candidate for
President in 1988 and was one of three Republican congressmen to vote
against the L.O.Y.A.L.T.Y. Act.
Ralph Babbitt
– Editor of the Canal Street Journal
Ahmad Badawi
– a Malaysian with theories on human genetics.
Professor Simon Barker – a
devotee of Ayn Rand and the economics of Ludwig von Mises who heads
the department of economics at Moundville.
Brenden Banks
- a graduate of Cal Tech.
Loyal
Barrington - the head of Green4Peace
International when the Rainbow Marine was first dedicated to the
protection of the planet in the 70s. A Libertarian.
Dreg Barnsdale
- the congressional aide to Borin Fletch - the Senator from Missouri
who made getting Orville Johns his seat on the Supreme Court a matter
of personal honor.
Fredrick Barry
– a model for conservative behavior. His best selling book
plastered the country and was titled, A Tome of Truths. He gambles,
and his dominatrix, Madame Ling accompanies him to Las Vegas.
Clarence
Bingley - an old friend of Gramps
and a semi retired local attorney.
Harold
Blandale – a science fiction
writer who followed in the traditions of Heinlein so closely he left
no footprints of his own.
Ralph
Bourbonstein - Secretary of Defense
for the Branch Administration.
Dormer
Bradshaw – a regular pundit on
Tough Talk
Jack Bradstreet - the junior
senator from Massachusetts and the Democratic candidate for President
in 2004.
Nora and Garth Brannons –
Garth is an enlisted serviceman in the Army. Nora is his wife. They
are both loyal Americans.
Wesley Bender – a former U.S.
Senator who is now running against Fore for the Democratic nomination
for President.
Horace
Blandinger – Secretary of State
for Ricardo Dixon
Ricke Blintz
– Dixon’s vice president. He was forced to resign.
Eben Boraden
– terrorist leaser responsible for 9/11
Bristol S. Branch – the Branch
Senior, a former senator from Connecticut whose son and grandson have
been elected President.
Ralph W. Branch - the
great-grandson of Bristol Branch
Matilda Brakmueller - the
founder of Raptor Homeguard, an apologist for using government to
prevent women from the exercise of their full rights.
Dwayne and Naomi Brenderhoffer –
the friends of Lindsey who hide her after she is threatened by Dicks.
Babbs Bronson – a producer of
specials that sometimes air late at night in the Midwest
Carly Brown – a female pundit
of the conservative variety. She is dumpy and pedestrian but
earnest.
Gregory Bugsley – the former
President of Moundville. This dynamo brought the institution for
higher learning out of the doldrums into prosperity making it the
premier school for the freedom movement. He did this at great profit
to himself while diddling every woman in sight including his
daughter-in-law.
Loretta Bugsley – the
daughter-in-law of Moundville President Gregory Bugsley who was
seduced by him and later committed suicide.
Marvin Burkowitz – a top
advisor in the administration of Fillmore Quince and still a close
personal friend who spends an enormous amount of time on the
computer.
Lily Carson – the young and
very blond technical advisor who Bernard met while arranging a tour
of Malaysia for Ronald Delmont.
Abdul Chepolti – a former
felon who is the administration pick as one of their own for the much
glamorized position of dictator of Iraq.
Dagwood
Chinsbaum – formerly a vice
president for the multi-national corporation, Hellsbegoring and now
vice president of the United States.
Minnie
Clayton- the woman who came forward
with charges against Orville Johns.
Jentry
Collingsworth – a congressman with
definite NeoCon tastes.
Rachael Cowling – a woman
prominent in the Libertarian Party nationally.
Richard Creek
– the founder of Rationality Foundation and the coiner of the term
privatization.
Brusk Crimshaw
– a hugely popular talk show host whose show originates from the
Empire State Building in New York.
Ronald
Delmont- the CEO of Benron
Diamond
– the private investigator hired by Dave.
Tom Dicks – a highly prominent
journalist serving on the Editorial Board of the Canal Street Journal
who actually is an agent for the coalition presently pumping for the
nomination of Randolph S. Branch, Jr. a Republican Governor from
Texas who is a candidate for President.
Ricardo Dixon
– the first US president to be impeached.
David von Mises Elder – the
hero of the story, a graduate of Moundville, Michigan and a
thoroughly good guy.
Jacob Elderhous – Gramps
Judith
Elderhous – Dave’s deceased
Aunt.
Rector Elliot
– Gladys’s father
Eleanor Elliot
– Gladys’s mother.
Bobby Lee Emory - President
elected in 1976.
Felix Eunuchman – a slightly
slimy journalist who likes to run up against the likes of Tom Dicks.
Darla
Farnsworth - called Dolly around the
Elk’s Lodge in a small town in Utah.
Ludmilla Fig
– a punditting regular on Tough Talk
Borin Fletch
– the Senior Senator from Missouri who did everything humanly
possible to secure enough votes to guarantee Orville Johns his seat
on the Supreme Court.
Jeb Franks
– attorney for President Quince and old friend who committed
suicide in the Rose Garden.
Jasper Figstein-Fog – the
libertarian master of persuasion whose eye is firmly on the bottom
line.
Drab Freeport
- the son of, the Nobel Laureate in Economics who writes books
people actually read.
Melvin
Freeport – the Nobel Laureate in
Economics.
Jeb Franks
- the attorney for Quince who had shot himself to death in the Rose
Garden.
Armstrong Fore – the Vice
President of the United States for the last two terms, serving under
Fillmore Quince. He is now a candidate for President himself.
Jim Garrity
– a professor or anthropology at NYU who is married to Nannette
Sacks.
Ralph Gibbons
- a Democratic Congressman from Massachusetts who occasionally tries
out for the job of Pundit on Tough Talk
Stanley (Pork)
Glibheart – a congressman from
Georgia who used his first wife to fund and position himself as an up
and coming presence for family values in the community. He dumped
her while she was in the hospital fighting cancer. He took the
money; she is now living on the charity of her church and he is on
his third wife though number two does not yet know this.
Percy (PG) Grolick – a veteran
from Florida who wants to start using political action to help
veterans.
Dr. Sybil
Gwynn – a professor at Yale who
was also and officer in the OSS, covert.
Drusilla
Hatfield – the sister of Trudi
Hatfield Steigler, Coop’s former wife.
Saddemun
Hesistan – the despot secular
leader of Iraq El-Dictator.
Commander Lionel Hays –
Commander of St. Petersburg Post No. 39, Veterans of Foreign Wars.
Bernard Hightower – a
petroleum engineer whose first job out of college was working for
Enron.
Frances Lemay Hightower – the
wife of Bernard Hightower.
Seth and Lee Hightower –
Bernard and Fran’s sons.
Dan Hightower
– Bernard Hightower’s brother.
Sandy
Hightower – Dan’s wife.
Roberta Hofmeyer - a tall, horsy
girl originally from Seton, North Dakota who tells everyone she is
from around Boston.
Dr. Jonas
Hopsmeyer - a professor of
philosophy at USC. First Libertarian candidate for president,
1972 election.
Craig Humstead – the Svengali
of political dirty tricks who is running the Branch campaign with an
iron foot.
Cliff Ironworker – Linden’s
former husband, the only man to ever stalk Ayn Rand.
Lloyd Jackson
– a journalist at the semi-underground NY paper the Town Trumpet
Orville Johns
– a Supreme Court Justice appointed although there were questions
about his qualifications and character.
Benny Kraust
- an attorney practicing in Los Angeles considered a cofounder of
Rationality Magazine.
April
Kravowitz - the lovely blond wife of
Frank.
Frank
Kravowitz – the pink diaper baby
recycling as a Republican.
Simon Knickerbocker – the
congressman from the area around Moundville.
Fredericka La Fond
– the woman who conned Coop.
Darrel Larson – his business
card announces him as an expert in public relations but his income
comes from extortion.
Jeff Lawrence – a former U. S.
Army officer, who was held in North Vietnam for 6 years, returned
home to run for Congress and is now running for the Republican
nomination for President.
Franklin
Leadpart – a Congressman who also
ran for President and served as Minority House Leader.
Karen Le Bray
– a woman engineer who had no intentions regarding motherhood.
Gregory
Linderheim – Babbs Bronson’s new
boy friend from Florida.
Feather
Lockley – a minor star in the
Hollywood constellation.
Rob Loper
– a news anchorman for XYZ news.
Jeff Le Strange – a friend of
Dave’s who always has the latest gossip.
Dr. Claude Less –
the father of Home schooling
Matthew
Maguire - the former chief of staff
for the Wallace administration.
Claire Manning – a woman
employed at Moundville.
Bobby Joe
Meredith - the cousin, who died
leaving George Weston with the duty of clearing out his office and
home in Garland.
Roy MacBrain
the grandson of the author of a famous series of children’s books
and an elector from Vermont in the 72 election.
Paul Shadow – a
career military enlisted man with custody of his four children from a
previous marriage.
Ralph ‘Musk’
McCallum - an oilman from
Canada who ran a huge conglomerate of interests all over the world
and B.A. Shreveport, another individual whose massive oil empire
included refineries and pipelines all over the world.
Loren Mendelssohn - the editor of
Federal Oversight
Jimmy McGee
- the Senator from Massachusetts and the brother of assassinated
President Jerry McGee
Tom McGonagall – a career
politician and pundit personality who always runs for the Republican
nomination.
Christopher Mershon – a
student volunteer during the Lawrence campaign in New Hampshire.
Ezekial, Charles and
Sunny Mitchell – sons of John and Helen Mitchell.
Helen Mitchell –
a mother, wife, and homemaker living in Charlotte, North Carolina
John Mitchell - a
husband and father and contractor living in Charlotte, North
Carolina.
Manda and Leah
Mitchell – daughters of John and Helen Mitchell
Jason Mitford
- was a student at Yale who dated Gladys.
Felicia
Morgenthau - a dark haired young
woman who is a member of the Hamiltonian Society in Los Angeles.
Brian Morris – a classmate of
Dave’s from Moundville. He went on from there to attend law school
at Columbia.
Barney Morris
- the mythic figure in the classics who fried his brains on
booze and drugs after a life time of abusing his wife and children.
Fidor Mortan
– a cofounder of Rationality Magazine who writes long and very
detailed analyses of comparative epistemology. He is an Objectivist.
Jan Morton – a thinly gorgeous
punditte with the personality of a bulldog. She is a bottle blond.
Dennis Neilson
– the founding Chairman of the Libertarian Party.
Dr. Valerie
Newcomb - the world famous
psychiatrist
Teri North
– radio talk show host. First vice presidential candidate of
the Libertarian Party. First woman to receive an electoral
vote.
Lancelot
O’Hara – a former Army
Intelligence agent who is also a writer and provocative member of the
New York Literati.
Hyman Opal
– the originator of the term, Neoconservative.
Fillmore Quince – a former
governor of Arkansas who was elected President of the United States
Mrs. Pratchet
- the former Prime Minister of England
The Professor – a libertarian
activist from Massachusetts.
Gladys Elliot
Ramsey – a child of the Easter Elite dedicated to improving the
world.
Lionel Ramsey
– Gladys’s former husband.
Vanessa Page
Ramirez - the first woman to be
named to the Supreme Court.
Don Richardson – the quasi-
journalist who writes the most scandalous and but read column in New
York, Page 3 ½
Paul Roofer
– a covert operative working for petroleum interests within the
United Nations.
Nanette Sacks – the first girl
that Dave ever worshiped from afar. She is slender, with flowing
blond hair and huge bluish green eyes. She is intelligent. Nann’s
father is an attorney practicing in Shipslide, Connecticut.
Debbs Satto
- the secretary for Matthew Maguire, the former chief of staff for
the Wallace administration.
General Brad Schlephosher –
the heroic general who emerged victorious from the previous war with
Iraq in the early 90s.
Jacob Schmitz – Jak, as his
friends call him, is a pseudo journalist whose newsletter on gourmet
restaurants is faxed regularly to all of his 13 friends across upper
Manhattan.
Ellen
Selfridge - the founding
president of NOW at Princeton
Jake Sludge - the pin headed
Internet weenie who was addicted to weather reports before adding
political gossip to the online menu of his starkly ugly orange and
black website and morphing into a millionaire.
Crass Smart - Secretary of State
for the Branch administration.
Loren
Steubenbaum – a Hollywood Producer
who made the mistake of helping Frank Kravowitz and, like most of the
Kravowitz enthusiasts, was sued for his efforts
Kim Tanner
– a young member of the Hamiltonian Society in Los Angeles.
Pooch (Sylvia)
Smith – a school friend of Eleanor
Elliot’s.
.
Dirk Smithers
– Coop’s former second in command.
Dagny Smithson - the younger
sister of Lindsey Smithson, a graduate of Moundville
Linden Smithson – Lindsey and
Dagney’s mother
Lindsey Smithson – the
daughter of a former Libertarian, now a Republican living in New
York.
Mildred
Stassenbaum – the intern who
nearly ended a presidency.
Ray Rayford Stiller
– a professor at NYU who does stand up comedy of the political
kind.
Jess Stone
– one of Bernard’s former bosses at Peace for the Planet.
Harvey Storm – the shocking
talk show host from New York who ran, however briefly, as a
Libertarian candidate for Governor.
Perk Story
– a pundit on Tough Talk
Dale
Sorenson - a Republican
Congresswoman from South Carolina.
Bert Sowers – An old friend of
Dave’s grandfather who is now living in Texas and selling
Recreational Vehicles.
Mark Stanley – An employee of
the New York Institute who was two years ahead of Dave Elder at
Moundville. He has moved into mainstream politics big time.
Beatrice
“Bead” Steigler – the young
daughter of Jack “Coop” Steigler
Trudi Hatfield
Steigler – the estranged wife of
Jack “Coop” Steigler
Robin
Symington – a long time friend of
Gladys, who she met before the London Conference in 1973. Robin is
from New Zealand and has dedicated his life and career to the
environmental movement
Loretta Mac
Taggart Shadow – the former wife
of Paul Shadow.
Griselda
Troutville – the dishonorable
judge who Coop debenches. Her family has been wallowing up to the
trough of public preferment for at least 8 generations although some
of those generations are pretty short.
Vladimir
VorMortag – a prodigy savant now
teaching law at UCLA.
Cyrus Washington – the
iconoclastic spokesman for the Western Alliance in Arizona.
Larry S. Waterhouse – the
savant whose personal skills leave much to be desired but whose math
and analytical skills are legendary.
George Weston - A good ‘ol boy
from Texas with no respect for politicians.
Edmund White
- former two time Libertarian presidential candidate
The Places,
Organizations, and non-human Players
American Field
Service – a service organization
which was actually used by the CIA in covert operations.
Benron – a huge corporation
dealing in energy sources including petroleum with close connections,
personally and financially, to the Branch family.
BNN
– an outlet for television news.
Cicero Institute – a not for
profit that was originally founded by Libertarians with the
assistance of a variety of interests. Their chief accomplishment to
date is to have suggested that Social Security be privatized without
ever saying how. They have been growing steadily in influence for
the last 25 years funded mostly by donations from oil companies.
Contact with
America – the Pledge offered by
Pork Glibheart that swept the Republican Party into the majority
position in Congress for the first time in a generation.
Daughters
Hotel – Large and stuffily elegant
hotel in Washington D.C. patronized by the personas of power.
Enterprising
for America Foundation – a
nonprofit that coins money for justifying the transfer of wealth from
American citizens and others to corporations and government.
Fabituso Society – a monthly
cocktail party lavishly subsidized by its two sponsors, The New York
Institute and Cicero Foundation.
Federal Oversight – A
prestigious organ that is instrumental in formulating Conservative
and Republican thinking.
Hellsbegoring
– a multi-national corporation that has a very cozy relationship
with all politicians.
Humpershots, Georgia – the
very nice small town outside of Atlanta where the Brenderhoffers
live.
The Fortress - the headquarters
of the Our History Foundation
Freed Democracy – a website
based in Fresno California that appeals to the nexus point of
Libertarian and conservative man who has little or no social life off
of the web.
FreeMarketPlace – A book store
now an on line virtual shop that formerly sold books for the Freedom
Movement all through the mail. Its patrons rarely use credit cards
preferring cash, gold, checks or barter.
Fulbright
College – a dorm at Yale.
L. O. Y. A. L
T. Y. Act. – a proposal rushed
into law after 9/11 that canceled the Bill of Rights.
Mossternistas – the dominant
leadership faction of the LP from 1984 – 2002.
Moundville – A tiny college
catering to 1,000 students each year in Michigan that is considered
to be the premier educational institution in the world by it cadre of
faithful supporters. This includes a sizable chunk of the Republican
and Libertarian Parties
Mother Earth
Day – a yearly event that began
with the United Nations in 1968.
Mt. Holybark
– one of the Seven Sisters
National
Outrage of Women – a women’s
organization founded to help women over come the problems of gender.
New York Institute – A policy
foundation located, not surprisingly, in New York, that produces
policy and opinion from a stable of writers drawn from Libertarian
and Conservative circles.
Our Country
– a leftist journal that is published nationally.
Our History Foundation – a not
for profit foundation whose interests run curious parallels with the
petroleum industry
Paymax Petroleum – one of five
oil companies that cooperate on deals all over the world.
Pre through
Graduate – the home schooling
curriculum put together by Fredrick Barry in the hopes of impacting
impressionable young people and making a fast buck.
Poaching the
Potomac – an Internet site that
grills the innocent along with the guilt
Prime Thoughts – newsletter for
Moundville College.
Randolph,
Bates, Farnum and Fineman – a
brokerage firm with offices in New York on Canal Street
Rivergate
– the massive complex in D.C. where the crimes of underlings
resulted in bringing down a president.
Shipslide, Connecticut – Dave
and Branch’s home town
Thatcher School –
Eastern Prep. School.
Skull and
d’Bones – a secret society
founded by an Illuminati wanna-be at Yale in the 1800s.
This Morning
Show – an early morning news and
chat show viewed nationally.
The Salty
Miner – the nicest eatery in a
small town in Utah.
The Wishing Bowl – a favorite
restaurant of the Hightower’s in Malaysia
Thursday Evening Club – a
monthly meet and greet held at the digs, home and offices run by
Maurice Freeborn in Washington D. C.
Tough Talk - An every night
commentary show airing on Vixen Television. Its moderator is Roger
Daniels, a tall blond board of a guy with a booming voice and cheery
attitude towards life.
Vixen
Television – a media outlet that
airs NeoCon opinions.
Watergate
– an upper end apartment building on 34th
Street in Manhattan across from the NY Hospital.
Westhaven Liberty Alliance –
spin off of the Libertarian Party in Arizona
Windhammer
College – one of the Seven Sisters
